I came across a quote by Bruce Mau that stopped me mid-scroll: “Cool is conservative fear dressed in black.” It got me thinking about my relationship with being “cool” and, honestly, my relationship with boredom. Mau’s idea seems to go deeper than just fashion—it’s about how we avoid real risk and settle for what feels safe and accepted. But what really stuck with me is how this ties into how we handle boredom today. Or, more accurately, how we avoid it at all costs.
Let’s face it: we’re glued to our screens. We’re constantly feeding ourselves the low-hanging fruits of entertainment to kill any chance of boredom before it even hits. We swipe, scroll, and tap our way through every dull moment, desperate for a hit of something—anything—that feels like engagement. But the truth is, most of it isn’t engagement; it’s avoidance. It’s the digital equivalent of dressing in black and calling it “cool”—a surface-level fix that keeps us from dealing with what’s really going on underneath.
We’re afraid of being bored because boredom is uncomfortable. It’s that awkward silence at a party, the empty space between tasks, or the restless feeling that creeps in when there’s nothing immediate to distract us. But boredom isn’t the enemy—it’s actually a gateway. A psychiatrist I randomly met at a bar one night told me, “Boredom drives creativity.” It was a throwaway line after a few too many drinks, but it hit me hard. We’re so quick to escape boredom that we forget it’s the birthplace of our best ideas. When we’re bored, really bored, we’re forced to sit with our thoughts, to dig deeper, and maybe even confront the stuff we’re too afraid to face.
The problem is, we don’t give ourselves that chance anymore. The moment boredom starts to creep in, we’re back on our phones, scrolling through endless feeds of memes, videos, and updates—none of which truly satisfy us. They’re just quick fixes, little bites of entertainment that keep us busy but not fulfilled. We’ve conditioned ourselves to reach for our devices instead of reaching for something more meaningful, something that actually challenges us or makes us feel something real.
It’s easy to see why. There’s no risk in scrolling. There’s no vulnerability in liking a post or sharing a meme. It’s comfortable, it’s safe, and it’s predictable—much like the “cool” Mau talks about. But this avoidance of boredom comes at a cost. We’re missing out on the opportunity to explore our creativity, to ask hard questions, and to do the kind of thinking that can only happen when we’re alone with ourselves.
I catch myself doing it all the time. Whenever I have a spare moment, my hand goes straight to my pocket, my thumb unlocking the screen before I even realize what I’m doing. It’s second nature, and it’s scary how reflexive it’s become. Instead of letting myself be bored, I’m chasing the next distraction, looking for that tiny dopamine hit to get me through to the next minute. But every time I do that, I’m choosing the easy route, the comfortable route—the “cool” route. And just like Mau’s quote suggests, it’s a way of dodging something deeper, something real.
There’s this idea that we need to be constantly entertained, constantly engaged, or else we’re missing out. But what we’re really missing out on is the chance to confront our own thoughts, to let our minds wander, and to stumble upon the kind of creativity that doesn’t come with a push notification. We’re robbing ourselves of those quiet, empty moments that force us to think, to create, and to address the core issues we keep avoiding.
So here’s a thought: the next time boredom creeps in, don’t run from it. Don’t reach for the phone or the remote. Let yourself feel it. Sit with it. Let it make you uncomfortable. Because it’s in that discomfort where the real magic happens. It’s where you stop playing it cool and start figuring out what actually matters to you. It’s where you do the hard work of addressing what’s really going on, instead of just covering it up with another layer of “cool.”
This isn’t just a reminder to put down the phone; it’s a reminder to stop dodging the real work, the hard work, the work that matters. Because at the end of the day, being “cool” is just fear dressed up in black, and boredom is the key to stripping it all away and getting to the heart of what truly drives us. It’s time to embrace the boredom and see where it takes us.
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